These Self-Love Toys Are So Discreet You Could Take Them Anywhere
Jas is the former Senior Content Specialist at Adore Beauty. A beauty admirer turned certified addict, she brings a sharp editorial eye and pop-culture pulse to everything she creates. Her words have appeared in The Age, Sydney Morning Herald, and Broadsheet. When she’s not producing viral content or podcasting about skincare, you’ll find her thrifting for vintage treasures or binging Bravo (strictly for research, of course).
Heads up, this article includes sexual wellness products from our Adore Beauty sex category. Now, onwards!
I have a pretty terrible memory at the best of times, but there are a few experiences that remain permanently etched in my brain as if they happened yesterday.
Like the time I bought my first self-love toy.
Picture this: The Gold Coast, Schoolies and my closest group of girlfriends (sound familiar?). Fueled by one too many vodka Cruisers, we decided that it was high time to explore the uncharted territory of pleasure products.
I remember thinking at the time that I had a fairly good handle on what to expect. Typical mindset for an 18-year-old who thought she knew everything.
But boy, was I wrong.
Stepping into the store, my jaw immediately fell to the floor. Any buzz I had evaporated as I gazed at the shelves and shelves of toys, costumes and accessories.
Completely overwhelmed and way in under my head, I opted for the least terrifying, non-threatening toy I could find and called it a day.
It would be years before I ever stepped back into a store. Or really explored the world of sexual wellness.
Looking back, with a touch more maturity under my belt, I can't help but wonder how different it would be today, with the abundance of products and sex-positive advice that’s now at our fingertips.
Some of these self-love toys are so discreet they could be confused for contemporary art. Perfect for those times when discretion is of the utmost importance.
Below, I've rounded up five to have on your radar. No more intimidation, no more hesitation – let's skip the awkwardness and head straight to 'P' town, shall we?
1. LBDO Essensual Vibe.
You’d be forgiven for thinking this is a beauty blender at first glance, but, surprise: it’s a vibrator!
Made from super medical-grade silicone, the LBDO Essensual Vibe is designed for external targeted or broad stimulation, either solo or with a partner.
It has a minimal design with six silent vibration settings–ideal for getting acquainted with your pleasure, sans unwanted sound travel.
Plus, it’s phthalate and latex-free, and waterproof; ‘nuff said.
Here’s what one user of the Essensual Vibe had to say about it:
“Taking control of your own pleasure is both powerful and necessary. Embracing your sexuality and sensuality is a crucial part of knowing and loving yourself.
It's exciting to constantly explore and discover new things about yourself, and embracing your sexuality is so empowering.
LBDO offers an amazing tool for this exploration.
Also, the cute design of the Essensual Vibe allows you to leave it out as a decoration, making it a discreet yet stylish addition to your bedroom.” - Melissa.
2. Smile Makers The Poet.
What: Smile Makers The Poet
A pleasure product that calls itself a poet? Say less.
This palm-sized vibrator is all about clitoral stimulation, using air pulsation technology to mimic a set of lips and the feeling of oral sex.
It contains five pulsation modes and three interchangeable ‘mouths’ to allow users to personalise their experience to what works best for them. And, bonus: it’s also silent.
In terms of other details, it’s worth mentioning that it’s made of 100% body-safe silicone, is phthalate-free and completely waterproof, making it safe to take with you anywhere, from the bathtub to vacations and everywhere in between.
Here’s what one ~satisfied~ customer had to say about it:
“I was excited to try it out and it did not disappoint! This isn't the first clitoral suction toy I've used but I honestly loved how unique it looked and felt on me.
The sensors on the sides were a really cool feature and the mouth shape felt oh so lovely. I don't know how else to describe it but I really love this toy.
It's easily one of my favourites!” - Gillian.
3. Le Wand Chrome Point Rose Gold.
Just when you thought self-pleasure couldn’t get any easier, Le Wand Point takes things to new heights to offer an external, hands-free experience.
It features a sleek, contoured design made from body-safe silicone and three simple buttons with 15 vibration modes and six intensity levels for curated control.
Other highlights include a weighted metal body, waterproof design, travel-lock capabilities, whisper-quiet functionality and a USB charger with an hour use time.
Here’s an excerpt from Jacqueline Tempera’s review for Women’s Health Magazine:
“No one wants to be the person with the vibrating bag at the airport. But everyone wants to have their favourite toys on vacay!
Le Wand answers this problem with the Point palm-sized vibrator. It's designed with a travel lock to avoid any awkward moments.”
4. Lovehoney Mon Ami Pleasure Air Rose.
This one takes the cake for the chicest vibrator I’ve ever seen.
As its name suggests, the Mon Ami Pleasure Air Rose is a rose-shaped vibrator designed to stimulate the clitoris through waves of undulating air.
It features 10 intensity modes and Womanizer’s award-winning, patented Pleasure Air Technology™ to strike the perfect balance between pulsating and massaging without touching the clitoris.
Like the previous toys I’ve touched on, this palm-sized vibrator is made using body-safe silicone, is waterproof, whisper-quiet and comes with travel-lock capabilities to ensure it doesn’t turn on at the wrong moment.
For everything else, I’ll leave it to this customer review:
“I totally love this toy. As with all the Mon Ami products, it’s beautifully designed and made with a high-quality, silky feel to it.
This one, however, goes the extra step with a gorgeous, feminine rose design that should be appealing to all, especially those new to adult toys.
The toy is so easy to use, charging is simple with a little magnetic connector and is operated by two simple control buttons that are easy to locate and lasts many, many sessions between charges.
As with all suction toys, it takes a few attempts to locate the best position for you but believe me it’s so worthwhile! Once you find your sweet spot it delivers earth-shattering orgasms time and time again (and again... and again !!).
In short, I think this is one of the best products I have tried. I totally recommend this to all.” - Mrs P.
5. Vush Gloss.
What: Vush Gloss
Of course, I had to slip in a little beauty with this lip gloss-looking vibrator.
Its fun-sized design fits perfectly in a purse or beauty bag, ideal for those seeking sensation when they’re on the go.
It contains 10 vibration settings and a precision point for personalised pleasure and features a single-button interface that makes getting there that much easier.
Again, our pleasure pals have done the lord’s work and made it soft, smooth and 100% waterproof. It also features a magnetic charging port and cord for easy use.
I could keep going, but I think this customer review says it all:
“This is the best bullet vibe that I've tried.
It's great value for money, the material feels awesome and looks good and has a very comfortable design.
The lid is also a massive plus for storage and transport - No need to hide it away in the back of a drawer. I could not recommend it more!” - Simone.
Final Thoughts.
So there you have it: five unassuming self-pleasure toys more than worthy of a place in your bedside table. Or on your display shelf, if you’re into that sort of thing–no judgement here.
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